Steve Halsey
Guest Columnist
Frequently during the movie “Forrest Gump,” the namesake says, “Stupid is as stupid does.” When it comes to criminal activity, there is no shortage of proof on YouTube and cable TV shows that this phrase is true. For example, we see burglars stuck in an air shaft or chimney. We may find such antics funny and almost beyond belief, but such antics can lead to tragedy for others and imprisonment for the perpetrator. Here are just a few cases, but the names have been left out to protect the innocent (and not-so-innocent) as they used to say on the 1960s show “Dragnet.”
In the past, I have sentenced two young men, each of whom was driving in excess of 100 mph. It reminded me of an incident a few years ago. A couple of young men are enjoying a ride on a beautiful day on their motorcycles, a kind which some call “bullet bikes.” One or both were caught speeding by a sheriff’s deputy, and a 15-mile chase ensued. These geniuses have elevated the incident from a petty misdemeanor traffic offense (speeding) to a felony (fleeing a peace officer in a motor vehicle) by trying to outrun the police officer at upwards of 100 mph on winding county roads. Each eventually pled guilty and was sentenced to some jail for endangering the police officers and others on the roads. They were lucky they didn’t kill themselves or someone else. Stupid is as stupid does.
Here are a few examples of a complete lack of good judgment I’ve read in criminal complaints:
• Driving over 100 mph without a valid license or insurance, with an unbelted child not in a child safety seat.
• Retail employees stealing gift cards from their employer, thereby forfeiting any chance to work in a big retail store in the future.
• Finding someone else’s lost credit card in a parking lot and immediately using it at a retail store with cameras everywhere.
We live in an age of ever-present security cameras in virtually every retail establishment, but frequently people leave large stores such as Walmart and Target with big screen TVs in a cart without paying for them and pass numerous security cameras on the way out of the store. What are they thinking? Perhaps the drugs or alcohol are doing the thinking for them. When clerks in these stores attempt to steal cash or gift cards, they are inevitably caught, charged, and end up with a criminal record and a computer record shared by all of the big retailers. They may never get a job in retail again. Stupid is as stupid does.
Unfortunately, some of the alleged victims of property crimes perhaps share some of the blame. I have seen criminal complaints where the defendant has written a dozen or more checks to a liquor store, gas station or bar, over the course of several weeks, and all of the checks “bounced” for insufficient funds in the bank. I can’t understand why the store or bar continued to accept the defendant’s checks even though they had been bouncing for weeks. Law enforcement has better things to do than act as the collection agency for a business acting irresponsibly under these circumstances. Also, many citizens leave valuables in their unlocked cars on the street at night, risking thievery.
Human behavior continues to keep a steady stream of defendants traveling through the criminal justice system, taxing the already overstretched office of public defenders. There has been discussion in the past at the Legislature about decriminalizing some traffic offenses, such as driving after suspension and driving a vehicle without insurance, making them petty offenses with no possibility of jail and thereby removing them from the caseload of the public defenders. However, to date there have been no significant changes to the penalties for these offenses.
In summary, be careful out there! There are a lot of stupid drivers on Minnesota roads in the winter. Please don’t be a victim of their lack of good judgment.
Steve Halsey is a Wright County District Court judge, chambered in Buffalo. Judge Halsey is the host of “The District Court Show” on cable TV public access channels throughout the Tenth Judicial District. Excerpts can be viewed at www.QCTV.org/districtcourtshow.